Product Details
＋You wouldn't download a gumball...
In this illegally-downloaded Gumball Machine, Ivan's pumping out Surplus from the dark web, rare & unique warehouse artifacts, and up to $500 in gift cards.
About the Sale
The Gumball Machine is simple and driven by pure chance. We select a bunch of items for clearance, publish the odds, and distribute them randomly as you order. No special requests for items are honored, it's all down to what the random number generator says...
In the end, everyone walks away a winner — we get to empty our shelves, and you get amazing deals and weird one-offs from our warehouse.
Please note that this is a clearance event. Returns are not accepted on Gumball orders.
A Special Note on Sizing & Condition
Sized Gumball items will be distributed randomly unless specifically stated otherwise in the description below. You are free to request certain sizes of items in your order notes but we can make no guarantees of availability.
Unless stated otherwise Gumball items are in either new or in Grade 1 (excellent) condition.
The Gumball Process
Below you will find the table of available items in the Gumball Machine, each with a corresponding percentile chance. Gumball Machine items are determined through the following RNG system — no requests for specific items are allowed.
Let’s say you have your eye on a particular item and want to calculate your chance of getting it, at least once, across multiple Gumballs. The formula for this is:
1 - ( 1 - % Chance) ^ (# of Chances)
If item A has a 20% chance per Gumball, and you purchase three Gumballs, here's how it would shake out. Your chance at item A is equal to:
1 - (1 - 0.20)^3 = 0.488
In other words, your chance at item A is 48.8%
Note: To use this formula you need to express the percentage chance in decimal form. The 20% chance in the formula above is written as "0.20" not "20."
Happy hunting and may RNGesus bless you!
"Rare" Items
| Item | Chance | Retail |
| Misc Safariland Glock Holsters | 1.09% | $60.00 |
| Evidence Locker Specials | 0.49% | $35.00 |
| 0.48% | $119.99 | |
| Warehouse Artifact | 0.39% | Unknown |
| 0.18% | $59.99 | |
| 0.10% | $159.99 | |
| 0.10% | $219.99 | |
| 0.10% | $50.00 | |
| 0.10% | $69.99 | |
| 0.08% | $229.99 | |
| 0.08% | $59.99 | |
| Old Gen Police Trade-In Riot Helmet with Face Visor | 0.07% | $50.00 |
| 0.07% | $124.99 | |
| Seer Damascus Riot Helmet with Steel Grid Face Visor | 0.05% | $147.99 |
| SureFire M88 Hellfighter Mount System | 0.03% | $599.99 |
| 0.03% | $199.99 | |
| 1 Year Free CONUS shipping | 0.03% | $150.00 |
| 0.03% | $100.00 | |
| 0.03% | $149.99 | |
| An Entire Charcoal Grill | 0.02% | $139.99 |
| JSOC KAG DEVGRU Bump Helmet (RARE) | 0.02% | $50.00 |
| 0.02% | $169.99 | |
| 0.02% | $229.99 | |
| 0.02% | $99.99 | |
| 0.02% | $99.99 | |
| USMC Peckham Polartec Thermal Fleece Pullover, Olive Drab, XL | 0.01% | $49.99 |
| Six-Pack RARE Goon Juice (Secure The Bag Registered Trademark) | 0.01% | So Much |
| Saint Gosling Prayer Candle (Peace Be Upon Him) | 0.01% | Priceless Relic |
| Ivan's USB (Hard Drive Cleaner :)) | 0.01% | $19.99 |
| Pumpkin Pie Straight To Your House Yummy Style | 0.01% | $19.99 |
| Ivan Feet Pics 😳🥵😳🥵😳🥵 | 0.05% | Thousands |
| The Original Deus Ex GOTY Windows 98 Edition | 0.01% | $34.99 |
| Uncle Ted's Big Ideas (The Book!) | 0.01% | Priceless :) |
| Afghan Large Pattern "Peace" Rug | 0.01% | $249.99 |
| 0.01% | $299.99 | |
| 0.01% | $500.00 |
"Common" Items
| Item | Chance | Retail |
| 8.72% | $23.99 | |
| Two-Pack Rare Ivan's Smoky Grads | 5.39% | $14.98 |
| 4.41% | $15.00 | |
| 4.39% | $34.99 | |
| Sport-Tek Sweatpants | 4.23% | $24.99 |
| 2.96% | $25.98 | |
| ERGO 18-Slot FDE Rail Cover, 3 Pack | 2.94% | $23.97 |
| Safariland Mag Pouches | 2.86% | $30.00 |
| 2.74% | $15.98 | |
| 2.45% | $19.99 | |
| 2.41% | $39.98 | |
| 1.96% | $24.99 | |
| Bose Gentex Triport CVC PTT and Mic Set | 1.94% | $49.99 |
| Two-Pack Assorted USGI UCP Pouches | 1.90% | $13.99 |
| 1.76% | $14.99 | |
| 1.67% | $25.98 | |
| 1.57% | $29.98 | |
| USGI ECWCS Thermal Undershirt Small | 1.57% | $19.99 |
| 1.55% | $39.99 | |
| 1.47% | $23.96 | |
| 1.47% | $39.99 | |
| 1.47% | $15.46 | |
| 1.37% | $15.98 | |
| 1.18% | $13.98 | |
| 1.18% | $23.98 | |
| 1.18% | $34.99 | |
| Two-Pack Sport-Tek Small-Medium Men's Spectator Glove Liner | 1.18% | $15.92 |
| 1.14% | $39.99 | |
| 1.08% | $31.98 | |
| 1.08% | $19.99 | |
| 1.08% | $15.98 | |
| 0.98% | $39.98 | |
| 0.98% | $25.00 | |
| 0.88% | $29.99 | |
| 0.78% | $39.99 | |
| 0.78% | $29.99 | |
| 0.78% | $34.99 | |
| 0.69% | $12.96 | |
| 0.69% | $89.99 | |
| 0.69% | $29.99 | |
| 0.69% | $16.99 | |
| USGI Beret | 0.69% | $12.99 |
| 0.65% | $39.99 | |
| 0.61% | $19.47 | |
| 0.59% | $39.99 | |
| 0.59% | $15.98 | |
| 0.59% | $31.98 | |
| 0.57% | $27.98 | |
| 0.49% | $29.99 | |
| 0.49% | $15.98 | |
| 0.49% | $29.99 | |
| 0.49% | $84.99 | |
| 0.49% | $15.98 | |
| Two-Pack USGI Tees | 0.49% | $15.98 |
| 0.47% | $19.99 | |
| 0.47% | $19.99 | |
| Blem Two-Pack USGI Waterproof Clothing Bag | 0.45% | $15.98 |
| USGI PRC Radio Pouch | 0.33% | $19.99 |
| 0.29% | $39.99 | |
| Assorted Safariland Baton or Handcuff Pouch | 0.29% | $29.99 |
| Old Tee Design :) | 0.29% | $24.99 |
| USGI Mosquito Headnet | 0.24% | $9.99 |
| 0.24% | $14.99 | |
| Blem USGI ESS Goggles | 0.24% | $24.99 |
| Three-Pack Blem USMC Coyote Brown STANAG Pouch | 0.22% | $12.97 |
| Czech M60 Canteen | 0.22% | $11.99 |
| 0.20% | $49.99 | |
| USGI UCP TAP Rig | 0.20% | $35.00 |
| 0.12% | $79.99 | |
| USGI PolarTec Fleece Bib | 0.10% | $24.99 |
| USGI Tan Utility Coverall | 0.10% | $50.00 |
| USGI OCP TAP Rig (No Chest Harness Straps) | 0.08% | $69.99 |
| Blem MARPAT Wet Weather Poncho Liner | 0.08% | $44.99 |
| Blem Versengtarn Field Shirt | 0.08% | $59.99 |
| Blem USMC Coyote Brown Bivy Cover | 0.08% | $99.99 |
| USGI UCP TCP Med Bag | 0.08% | $79.99 |
| 0.06% | $34.99 | |
| 0.04% | $39.99 | |
| USGI Flight Coverall | 0.04% | $75.00 |
| Blem USGI MultiCam Medic Bag | 0.02% | $100.00 |
